Hi I'm the D - yeah, you're the Doctor, we know
by Yuna Cifer
Summary: When the TARDIS is pulled through a crack in the Time Vortex: and the Doctor and his companions land in an alternate dimension not unlike our own except for one key difference. The Doctor doesn't exist; in his place is a long running sci-fi series.
1. Chapter 1

The TARDIS shook traveling through the Time Vortex: Martha, Jack, and the Doctor grabbed onto the console trying not to be thrown around like a virtual ragdoll by the TARDISes violent shaking.

The Doctor shouted trying to explain what was happening, "We've travelled to close to a crack in the Time Vortex, were being pulled through!" he said while running around the console flipping switches and banging on this or that.

"What's that mean for us exactly, Doctor?" asked Jack holding on to the railing.

"I don't know but whatever it is, its strong there's nothing we can do, were going through," said the Doctor grinning, flipping switches and hitting another with a hammer.

"Where is it taking us, can you tell?"

"I don't know, it could be taking us anywhere,"

The TARDIS jerked knocking them all down, the roundel in the middle wheezed going up and down pulling them through the aforementioned crack.

Eventually the wheezing stopped signaling there landing with another jerk and a shake.

"Were are we Doctor?" asked Martha, standing up.

The Doctor popped up on his feet checking the round counsel flicking a few switches and then pulling a screen close to his face, one of his brows furrowed.

"Well…?" said Jack impatiently.

"I have no idea, but lets find out - _Allons-y!" _said the Doctor grinning, skipping down the stairs, stopping at the door.

Jack and Martha followed him, they reached the door waiting for him to open.

"This is exciting, we could be anywhere in the universe - the end of the universe even - outside of it, inside of it - oh the possibilities," the Doctor said grinning from ear to ear, rocking back and forth and his heels.

Martha rolled her eyes and stepped forward pulling the door open, a giggle escaped her lips.

"Or, we could be in London," Martha said smiling, Jack walked up beside her looking at the familiar surrounding.

"Hah! - so much for the end of the universe," Jack said barely containing his laughter.

"What? Huh - but, London, " the Doctor sputtered trying to make sense of what was going on, suddenly he looked up at the sky, expecting zeppelins - but the sky was clear, zeppelin-less.

"Seems like we didn't go very far after all Doctor," teased Jack, walking away from the TARDIS onto the sidewalk ahead.

Martha followed Jack, looking around. "Looks just like London, say when are we Doctor?"

The Doctor caught up to them, following them down the sidewalk. The Doctor stuck out his tongue and sniffed the air, testing it.

"2013 - a bit ahead of your time, nothing to different though," said the Doctor hands tucked into his pockets.

The trio walked down the sidewalk not seeing anything out of the ordinary. Then they rounded a corner: coming across groups of people walking down the sidewalk as well, all heading in the same direction.

"Is it just me or do all of those people look like the Doctor?" asked Jack perplexed, his eyes narrowed as he looked across the street.

" No, you're right Jack I see it too," answered Martha sounding just as miffed by what they were seeing.

The Doctor just gazed across the street, his face expressionless, lips pressed into a hard line. Jack looked at the Doctor, to see what he thought.

Jack straightened at the Doctors expression, "Doctor, you have that look."

The Doctor looked down at Jack, " What - what look?" the Doctor said innocently.

"The look, the one that says something is up and we all know it , look," said Jack testily.

"Yes, that look sorry about that,"

"Is _there_ something wrong Doctor?," asked Martha looking straight at the Doctor, seriously.

The Doctor stared at the groups of people strolling down the sidewalk. A lot of them carried packs that looked pretty heavy. Not all of these people looked like the Doctor though one person he noticed, was wearing Jack's vintage WWII coat - just as he was now.

There were a lot of 'familiar' people, just as the Doctor thought he saw someone he knew they would turn and it would all fall apart. Donna's red hair, Roses blue jacket, Sarah Jane's mousy brown hair.

His past companions, his past regenerations. How was this possible - how did all of these people know this about him? What else did they know?

A voice broke into his reverie. The Doctor blinked grinning at Martha who had brought him out of his thoughts.

"You okay Doctor I asked you a question?" questioned Martha, laying a hand on the Doctors arm.

"Fine, I'm always fine,"

"So what do you think is up Doc, because last I checked everyone wasn't dressing up as you or your previous companions - not that I mind people dressing up as me, this is just a bit creepy is all," cut-in Jack, still looking at the passerby spotting a man with a ridiculously long scarf.

"It's a little Twilight Zone, ain't it," said Martha

"Well you're not far off - it's a Alternate Dimension," said the Doctor, beside Martha .

"Alternate Dimension?"

"Yup," said the Doctor, popping the 'p'.

"So were basically in an Alternate Dimension were everyone is obsessed with the Doctor so they've created a cult in which they annually dress as the one and only Doctor - cool where can I join, convert me now," said Jack, skipping forward following the crowd.

"Wait, Jack we don't know what's going on," shouted the Doctor, but his words fell on deaf ears as Jack had already sped ahead.

"Come on Martha, lets figure out what this 'cult' is up to," said the Doctor to Martha but found he was talking to air. The Doctor spun 360 degrees searching for Martha, looking up and down: then he saw her kneeling down looking at something.

"Doctor, I don't think we have to worry about a cult," said Martha, standing up frown on her face, holding out a piece of paper.

The Doctor took the proffered piece of paper, read it quickly. The poster had a picture of a man with floppy hair and bowtie, standing next to a round faced women. The poster read as thus:

_ Official Doctor Who Convention'13_

_ 50th Anniversary Celebration_

_ Guests Appearances by: Matt Smith, Karen Gillan, Arthur Darvill, Billie Piper, John Barrowman, David Tennant, Freema Agyeman, and Noel Clarke._

The Doctor looked up from the poster at Martha, "What's a convention?"

Martha looked up at the Doctor, opening and closing her mouth; thinking of the best way to answer.

She wasn't to surprised at all that the Doctor didn't know what a convention was, he was always confused about Human manners and such. He still couldn't get through his thick head that Humans had to sleep for 7-8 hours otherwise they wouldn't be able to run around in the morning.

"It's...it's a - when like a group of people with the same interests gather to, to share those interests with each other," finished Martha, she had been to a few medical conventions listening to conferences. This was different though.

"Oh, Jack was right then," said the Doctor rocking back on his heels, as he peered around, a women in a brown duster walked by. The Doctor arched a brow, but turned back to Martha.

"What?"

"The cult - it's a cult then."

"No, no it's not a cult Doctor, it's not a religion." said Martha exasperated. " There - there, fans"

"Fans?"

" Yeah like on a t.v. show, these names here," said Martha, pointing to the list of names on the poster. "I think there actors."

"Actors in a t.v show, about what?" said the Doctor, ruffling his hair, examining the poster.

"Doctor Who," said Martha simply.

"I hate that question," stated the Doctor.

"It's about you I think, what else is a show named Doctor Who gonna be about."

"I think it's time we caught up with Jack, come on Martha - _Allons-y!" _said the Doctor running ahead Martha following behind.


	2. Chapter 2

**_Hi! peeps I've just noticed that I didn't write an A/N for last chapter so my apologies. So anyways this is completely unedited so I apologize in advance for horrid grammar or punctuation. As you may have noticed I am extremely lazy hence the late update - I write when I feel like it. Anyways. _**

**_Disclaimer: I do not own the Doctor, Captain Jack Harkness, or Martha Jones, if I did then they never would have left the TARDIS - oh yeah I don't own the TARDIS either. The wonderful people at BBC own it. _**

* * *

The Doctor and Martha reached the doors of the convention center, panting slightly from having sprinted there.

"Hey, Doc took you long enough." Shouted a voice. It was Jack.

The Doctor and Martha strode over to Jack who was standing nearer to the entrance. Just as they were halfway there, a mousy-haired girl approached the Time Agent, holding out a piece of paper.

She said a few things, pointed to the paper and held a pen out to him. Jack grinned, writing on the paper, handing it back when he finished.

The Doctor and Martha reached Jack, both sporting puzzled expressions.

"That's the fifth time that's happened, since I got here." said Jack joking, but underneath a little irritation slipped in.

"You're signing autographs now?" teased the Doctor. Jack just grinned.

"Jealous Doctor, you want my autograph?" said Jack waggling his eyebrows.

"About that, we know what's going on," Martha cut-in.

"Yeah I know, the Doctor doesn't 'exist' here, 'Doctor Who' does - the t.v. show at least." said Jack, gesturing to a poster on the opposite wall.

The Doctor looked at the poster, it had all of his past regenerations and past companions, plus his present ones and what appeared to be his future ones as well.

The Doctor hmmm'ed in his throat.

"Who are they Doctor?" said Martha pointing at the four unknown people in the poster.

"I don't know." said the Doctor.

"Look ,it goes in chronological order -," said Jack running his finger across the faces of the regenerated Doctors." 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8…10 and 11." Jack finished, tapping the last face between the eyes.

"That's you Doc...I'm sorry." said Jack sadly, looking at the Doctor like he was already dead.

"Sorry for what?"

"That chin." said Jack bluntly.

" Oi!"

"And your hair - oh I could go on, but -," said Jack dragging out the last words, he laid his whole hand on the poster-Doctor's face now, using it to lean against the wall.

"Guys, focus!" shouted Martha interrupting Jack.

"Right, right - alternate dimensions, time going wibbly-wobbly, t.v. becoming reality, reality becoming t.v. - how could I forget." said the Doctor, carding a hand through his hair as he looked over the crowd of people going through the front door.

"I don't think we can just walk in." Martha announced, catching the Doctor's gaze.

"No problem." said the Doctor, sliding his hand into his trans-dimensional coat pockets and taking something out, waving it around.

"Psychic paper." said Martha.

"Yup," said the Doctor popping the 'p'. The Doctor started toward the entrance but stopped when Martha and Jack weren't following.

"Well, come on I'm not getting any younger - oh Jack could you stop that." said the Doctor.

"Stop what?"

"That," said the Doctor waving his hand in the direction of Jack's, which was still supporting him against the wall.

Jack looked over at his hand against the wall, realizing he smiled sheepishly releasing his hand from the poster-Doctors face.

"Sorry about that, Doc."

"Fine, well come on along." said the Doctor hurrying toward the entrance Martha and Jack following now.

"Allons-y."

They reached the ticket booth meeting almost no trouble at all except for a strange group of girls who all wanted a autograph from the Doctor and Jack respectively.

"Tickets please," said the teenaged boy behind the booth not looking up from his novel.

"Oh right, right," said the Doctor pulling out the psychic paper flashing it to the boy for longer than was necessary.

The teenager looked at the I.D., his eyes widening he looked back up at the Doctor then back to the I.D. and back again several times.

The boy seemed shocked for a couple minutes but composed himself by clearing his throat and addressing the honored guests.

"Right Mr. Tennant, Mr. Barrowman, Mrs. Agyeman - " the teenaged boy said, but was interrupted by a rude and still- not-ginger-alien.

"Tennant that's weird it's usually Smith," said the Doctor, he turned to Martha shoving the psychic paper in her face causing her to lean back. "What's that say?"

"Says Agents Smith, Jones, and Harkness and some other nonsense." said Martha, shrugging her shoulders.

"Weird, very weird….oh well," dismissed the Doctor with a flourish of his hand nearly smacking Jack in the face.

"Sir, here are your passes...a-and there is a panel in ten minutes for the cast of Doctor Who...uh someone will show you the way...uh sir." finished the teenager, handing the three time-travelers golden guest passes.

The Doctor made no move to relieve the boy of the passes so Martha had to take them smiling at the boy, apologizing for the Doctor's behavior and that he is always like that.

The Doctor skipped inside the convention center, Martha and Jack close behind. The Doctor was looking everywhere but forward as he entered the building so when he did face forward he jumped back clutching his hearts.

Reacting instinctively Jack pulled out his blaster ready to destroy whatever frightened the Doctor. Martha also tensed but having no weapon she just searched for whatever made the Doctor react like he did. Then she saw it: a Dalek.

With new distance between the Dalek now the Doctor composed himself - standing up straighter, adjusting his brown duster - in front of his greatest enemy.

Jack's every muscles was tensed and about two seconds from blasting the thing to smithereens.

"Doc, what's it doing here?"

"I don't know." responded the Doctor.

"Why isn't it doing anything?"

"I don't know." parroted the Doctor.

Martha by now had regained her wits and noticed something vital missing from the Dalek. So against her better judge Martha approached the Dalek.

"Martha, . ?" said Jack through clenched teeth.

"Just checking," Martha finally got close enough; reaching out her hand she touched the Dalek. Behind her she could hear an intake of breath from both Jack and the Doctor.

Martha ran a hand down the Dalek and noticed that it was completely smooth...flat. There were no roundels surrounding the body of the Dalek. She could see them of course but not feel them.

She knew now what it was, and it definitely wasn't a Dalek. Martha chuckled quietly at herself feeling silly that she let this thing scare her.

The Doctor and Jack rose their brows when Martha started to laugh.

"Uh...Martha care to share?" questioned Jack, blaster still clutched tightly in his hands.

"It's not a Dalek," said Martha plainly.

"What?" questioned both the Doctor and Jack.

"It's fake not real, it's cardboard."

"What? How?" said the Doctor, ruffling his hair leaving it sticking in inevitably the wrong direction. The Doctor approached the 'Not-Dalek', leaning closer to it he stuck out on solitary finger and poked it.

The Dalek bounced backwards and forwards for a second until finally resting in one place.

The Doctor made a face leaning away from the Dalek even though it was confirmed that it was indeed cardboard.

"That's just vulgar." said Jack sounding disgusted.

The Doctor and Martha agreed, nodding their heads.

Wanting to get away from the offensive cardboard-Dalek they all agreed to head as far away as possible.

With the Doctor leading they all headed through the large convention center, which seemed to have the Doctor's face every few feet.

Suddenly a crackling sound came over head and a female voice was heard:

_Harry Jamison please come to the front entrance -your family is looking for you. Harry Jamison please - _

The announcement repeated the Doctor and Martha kept on walking as the announcement went on but were still listening with rapt attention.

Suddenly Martha gasped noticing something; the Doctor halted at Martha's gasp giving her a questioning look.

"What-What's the matter?" said the Doctor eyes roaming Martha's body checking for injury.

"Nothing, nothing - but where's Jack?" said Martha.

A look crossed the Doctors face for a second but it was gone in a second, then he just shrugged his shoulders.

"Hmmm...dunno," said the Doctor, suddenly fixated on the fluorescent lighting in the hallway they were in.

"_Doctor._" said Martha exasperatedly.

"Don't worry Martha its Jack," said the Doctor offhandedly, still staring at the lights.

"That's exactly why I'm worried." said Martha following the Doctor's gaze up to the ceiling.

Suddenly the lights flickered and a shout was heard down the hall. The Doctor and Martha looked at each other through the flickering lights and ran toward the shouting.

They reached the end of the hall only to find a group of teenagers yelling and laughing. The now two time travelers watched as over a hundred people flooded into a room. They stood until every last one of them were inside.

_Ron Smith please come to the front entrance - your family is looking for you. Ron Smith - _

Martha listened to the announcement again her stomach swirling. This was too much of a coincidence, the lights, and the announcements. It was basically a Rule of the Universe that where ever the Doctor is so is trouble.

"Hey, you two it's time get in here!" shouted a voice.


	3. Chapter 3

**Sorry thes took sae lang but ance again laziness an' skale got in th' way, but Ah hiner ye loch it anyway. Also a certain scottish lad is in thes chapter sae 'at is wa everythin' is scottish-y.**

**On another note (a sad one) Richard Griffiths who played Vernon Dursley in they Harry Potter films passed away at 65. So in remembrance this chapter is for him. Rest in peace Richard Griffiths. **

******Disclaimer: Ah dinnae ain David Tennant, Matt Smith, ur onie ay th' Doctur Who cest if Ah did 'en weel.**

* * *

The Doctor and Martha followed the voice and were immediately ushered into a large conference like room. Inside the conference room was a raised platform a long table on top, as they entered names were called and people sat at the table.

He and Martha stood not sure where to go until: "David Tennant and Freema Agyeman!"

The Doctor and Martha stood for a few seconds until they were pushed forward toward the long table. They both sat down with bemused expressions on their faces

The Doctor sat in a seat next to a blond who was turned talking to a man who was talking animatedly. Martha sat next to the Doctor as the announcer continued to call out names and more people filed in.

"Matt Smith, Karen Gillian, Arthur Darvill, and Noel Clarke." said the announcer.

The four newcomers sat down as they were called. First was the floppy haired male who sat next to Martha; then was the red-head followed by a brunette male and a dark-skinned man.

The Doctor only recognized one the newcomers as Mickey Smith but knew that as parallel worlds went that he wouldn't go by that name in this dimension. He studied the other three humans and noticed how close they all were.

The Doctor was pulled from his musings by a tapping on his shoulder and a voice asking for 'David' he was just about to correct the person and tell them that his name was most certainly not David when he saw who it was; or at least who it appeared to be.

The Doctor stared at the blonde who so resembled his former companion Rose. His throat constricted, his hearts sped up, and breathing instantly became difficult as if he had fallen in freezing waters.

Nine seconds passed and he composed himself or at least as well as he could.

The actor misinterpreting the Doctor's silence for confusion repeated her question.

"So, how are you David?" said not-Rose running her tongue across her teeth, scratching behind her head.

The Doctor didn't know how to respond; he had no idea who this person was although he felt like he should. This girl should probably felt the same way although she didn't know yet. The Doctor searched for a response a simple human one; he had no idea who he was impersonating.

"I'm fine, always fine," said the Doctor, hoping that wasn't too strange of a response for whoever he was supposed to be impersonating.

"Alright, you sure you look a bit pale though," she replied.

"I'm fine, really Ro-,"said the Doctor realizing he didn't know her name even though 'David' should already know. The Doctor's eyes searched for an ID, anything. Then he found it name cards her name was Billie Piper. "Billie, fine." Weird he'd never imagine Rose as a Billie but that was a moot point in this new dimension.

Billie just nodded.

Suddenly the room quieted down as a moderator began talking telling everyone that this was a Q & A panel so everyone should feel free to ask any questions. The Doctor tuned everything out at that point. There was something going on and he didn't have time for human trivia or whatever.

Point number one: they had landed in an alternate dimension with very few differences to the one they were previously in besides the fact that this dimension has had no alien contact whatsoever including himself.

Point number two: In this dimension he was replaced with a TV show. Now this was very odd, of all of the strange and peculiar things he'd witnessed this was up there. This was why he stayed away from alternate dimensions.

Point number three: something was going on, people were disappearing, electrical activity. It was too much to be a coincidence. It wasn't just the TARDIS that was pulled through the crack in the Vortex.

A voice drifted through the Time Lords thoughts and before he knew it Martha was elbowing him in the ribs. He looked at her rubbing his sore ribs.

"What was that for?" he said, questioning lifting a brow.

"_David_ you have a question," Martha hisses under her breath, another blank face. Then: Oh, David, David the man who impersonates the Doctor in the show.

The Doctor's mouth forms a little 'o' as he realizes. Carding a hand through his hair he turns toward the audience, all patiently waiting for his answer; hand resting on his ear, tugging at the lobe.

"Right, right so what was the question?"

A young blonde girl stands repeating her question. "Um...how do you feel about Matt Smith playing the Doctor?"

"Who?" blurts out the Doctor, he quickly searches the name cards from earlier and spots on that says _Matt Smith - Eleventh Doctor_.

"Ah, right right...of course you - " says the Doctor leaning across Martha to get a look at his next 'regeneration'. Jack was right his chin was ridiculous and the hair.

Although this man wasn't technically himself objectively speaking, he couldn't help thinking for just this moment that was his next regeneration, subjectively speaking of course.

The Doctor answered truthfully of course telling them exactly what he thought about the 'next Doctor'.

"Still not ginger," said the Doctor, genuinely disappointed.

The audience and the actors, even Martha began laughing and chuckling. The Doctor found no humor in this, there was nothing funny in not being ginger.

The laughter subsides and just as another question is being asked and an answer is being given a melodious chime rings out cutting of the important answer.

The Doctor grins cheerfully out at the audience unaware of the chiming, actually he finds the tune quite soothing and he grins wider. Just as the Doctor is getting into the pleasant tune he is once again pinched in the ribs by Martha who is giving him an exasperated look.

She whispers, "Doctor that's you your mobile, and you owe me for leaving me these people," hissed Martha in the Doctor's ear.

The Doctor's eyebrows rose but he fished the phone out of his pocket anyway. He looked at the number curiously and then answered.

"Hello - Jack...wait slow down -," the Doctor's expression morphed from mildly bemused to the strict and serious expression he so often wore when trouble was approaching.

"...stay calm, ok - where are you? no no no no - that won't work," The Doctor was now standing pacing his voice frantic as he talked to the Time Agent on the other line.

"I - just whatever you do - don't blink - please Jack you can do it, just hold on." a pause, starts toward the exit, Martha following behind.

"I'm on my way - don't blink no matter what - no, no don't don't, Jack, Jack!," screams the Doctor into the receiver his expression furious, hand clutching the small mobile so tightly his knuckles turn white.

Everyone the actors, audience even Martha and the Doctor are so preoccupied that they don't notice two persons enter the conference room. Two persons who look remarkably like the two people who are now standing in the middle of the raised stage.

The taller speaks first, "Sorry waur late, got a bit held up…" unfortunately the taller one stopped speaking his Scottish brogue trailing off to the dismay of certain fans of said accent.

As it may certain things were distracting the Scott as there was a certain doppelganger a mere foot in front of said Scot, gracing the surrounding room with said accent again but with a question instead.

"Whit is gonnae oan?" asks the Scotsman is voice serious, unsure what to make of the situation.

At the very justified question the room broke from its trance realizing there were was now two sets of identical people and this was a problem.

Immediately the occupants of said room burst in an uproar questions firing off. On the stage all actors at the table were now standing a bit further away from the Doctor and Martha than before as they now were not sure of whom these people were.

The Doctor and Martha stood surrounded in chaos as the room at large dissolved into panic. The audience a mixture of excitement, anger, and panic. The actors on stage practically had the duo trapped and were demanding answers.

They were trapped and whatever passed as UNIT or Torchwood in this dimension was going to dissect them seven ways to Sunday.


End file.
